Everything lately has been feeling like too much. It’s a feeling hard to escape.

Am I doing the right thing? Do I get joy from what I’m doing anymore? Where should I go next? Why isn’t this thing working as I want it to? Why do I sit in this chair all day? Am I a prisoner of my own reality?

Nothing feels like it has been making a dent anywhere. Standstill. Time the only constant. Wake up, go to sleep. Stay alive. Fight for another day. Rinse and repeat.

Swarms of negativity. Hoards of bumps in the road. Pushing sand up the hill, wind blowing as hard as it can. Less sand. Not what I need to build a castle.

Tax to pay soon, much of. Car tyres need replacing, all 4. Brakes too. Rent to pay, a need to move place too. The next 6 months uncertain.

Costs going up for my business. Flatlined. Time to cut again.

Another day dreading sitting in front of my computer, joy taken from me so much the past year. What am I doing here? Should I move on?

Opening a project of mine, yet tarnished memories. Memories so strong I feel like quitting. Burn it all. Start again.

Is this what I want? Is this what I had in mind? Is this the right path?

No end in sight. A low day. A sad week. A depressing month.

A family to feed. I must fight. Keep going. Their lives depend on it.

A heavy burden, it feels too much. But fight I will. Fight to live another day. Fight so my family is safe and sound. Warm.

Life is complicated. There is so much, and it feels too much.

Another week just ahead. A new day tomorrow.

Things sit heavy on my chest. Exercising helps visualise this. Pushing harder, getting stronger. Resilient. Heavy weights to symbolise the burden of reality.

Never giving up. Staying strong. Pushing through it.

I can do it.

✌️❤️